Meet my neighbour Captain Underpants and why we need to live and let live...

You will no doubt be relieved, dear reader, to learn that I -- after a year of living up in these here hills --  have finally come face to face with my neighbour, although I can't honestly say that my fears regarding any axe-wielding murdering tendencies he might harbour -- real or imaginary -- have been allayed all that much. Axe-wielding murderers aren't always easily spotted, particularly when they're wearing just their underpants.

When I say face to face, what I mean is that the decaying wall which hitherto stood between his house and mine has been knocked down to reveal a building with a large glass window running from floor to ceiling, revealing the inner-workings of his entire life. In all its underpanted glory.

He appears to live in just this one room, and there is a sheet-less double bed in the corner where he sleeps. He has made some efforts to conceal his world from our view, by stringing a couple of blankets across the top of the window, but they aren't very effective.

Every night, as it gets dark, he returns from work, switches on all the lights - thus illuminating his every move -- shrugs out of his regulation work wear, and relaxes on his shabby sofa with a beer or two perched amicably atop his large round stomach. 

Oh yes, the lonely evenings of a FIFO-widow just fly by with this new source of entertainment. Lets just hope those underpants remain in that room, and don't make an unannounced visit to my bedroom one dark, lonely night, looming an axe above my head...

Irish Families in Perth - where's the love man?

Some months back I joined the 'Irish families in Perth' Facebook page, a wonderful resource for those Irish families arriving to Perth's shores in their droves each week. It is the go-to page for every newbie question, from 'which suburb to live in', to 'where to buy bananas' (believe it or not, a big topic of conversation here).

There is a sort of hierarchy here among the Irish in Perth, with those that have been here longest perched right on top. Most of these people are wonderfully helpful to the newly arrived, doling out advice like dollops of comforting syrup, providing solace to those who have recently catapulted across the globe as a result of a succession of feckless governments rather than wanderlust. The veterans of Perth are invaluable to these families as they struggle to gain footing in their new lives.

There are however a small minority of Perth veterans, who seem resentful, even scornful of those who are struggling with what in many cases has been an unwanted and unplanned life-long move, and seek to censor anyone voicing concerns over living costs, the shock of living in an alien culture, or who just miss Penneys, with the age old refrain 'if you don't like it, go back to where you came from'.

This is a pity and is at odds with the ethos of the page, which is to help, advise and support fellow Irish people. But I can't help but wonder why. Did these people miss out on the Celtic Tiger, and feel somehow resentful towards those who not only lived through it, but perhaps benefited from it? Is our emotionally incontinent generation at odds with their own stiff-upper lipped one? Did they too struggle when they first arrived here, but never felt able to express it? Do they resent the many technologies available to us now - such as Facebook, Skype, etc. which make the expat experience so much more bearable than when they exited Ireland back in the 80's?

We humans anger at what we fear, of what feels like a threat to our world-view, and in a way I understand their anger. We do have it much easier in many ways; in other ways these technologies can hold us back, preventing us from fully engaging with our new environment, yanking us backward into a nostalgic swamp with the ping of an instant message.

Of course nobody wants to listen to someone banging on week after week about how much they hate Perth, or how expensive it is. Like anywhere, Perth offers good value if you are willing to hunt it down or lower your standards. But from my experience, and from what I have read on the page, nobody is doing this. Some people just want to have a little rant on their off-days, those days where they may have just said goodbye to their mother at the airport, following her month-long visit, nursing a small doubt about whether they'll ever see her again. Or perhaps on the morning of a much-loved brother's wedding, where their only role in the proceedings will be a phone call home before everyone leaves for the church. Sometimes people just wake up wondering if they will ever be able to call this beautiful, enormous, dog-earned continent home; can it ever replace Ireland for them?

Those friendly long-term Perth residents will tell you it can. For many newbies this is a heartening message, for others it is a worry - will they somehow 'lose' something of themselves if they -- as one long-term Perth resident put it -- 'just give in to it and let go of Ireland'.

We're all just trying to figure out how to live together on this planet, to get through uncertain times with hopefully a laugh along the way. Pages like Irish families in Perth can help with this; can help us laugh at ourselves sometimes, and each other too. So people, let's live and let live, and perhaps start a campaign to get Penneys online?